Blessed...so blessed

This week has been really eye-opening for me in many ways. On Wednesdays, Grace Community Church serves dinner to between 150 and 200 homeless people. This was my first week volunteering to serve dinner. I went, mostly because I'd heard about it, and I had really been affected by the soup-kitchen experience I had this summer in California. I had no idea, though, that I would be so affected by my experience at Grace. Maybe it was the children who have no where to call home. Maybe it was the gracious looks from the adults. Maybe it was the frigid weather outside. Maybe it was the realization that it wasn't just the food, or the warm building, but the love that we could offer through Jesus that might affect these people. I don't know what it was, but I was in tears by the end of the night. In tears because I had a warm place to lay my head, hot meals at school three times a day, and in general more material things than I needed, more blessings than I could count. I want to go back...because I don't want to stay in the college-bubble, of believing that I am "poor" or that I am not well-off or blessed. Because I am. And I praise God that my heart longs for these people to be blessed and to know Christ. I am grateful that my heart broke for these people, and I want it to continue to break because the need remains, and to ignore it or pretend it doesn't exist because it's too heart breaking is not what God calls us to do.

On Thursday night at InterVarsity, we talked about Silence. About how little time we spend in silence, and how we are looking for God to speak in a booming voice. And maybe, in doing so, we miss the whisper. Max Lucado puts it: "Because we look for the bonfire, we miss the candle. Because we listen for the shout, we miss the whisper. But it is in burnished candles that God comes, and through whispered promises that He speaks, 'When you doubt, look around; I am closer than you think.'" I am terrible with silence, or quiet time. I do spend time in the word and in prayer, but I think there's this idea of meditation that I'm missing. I have a tendency to fill up my schedule beyond belief, leaving no time for downtime. I don't want the thoughts in my head to flood my mind and overwhelm me. It's easier to be constantly busy than to deal with things that are hard, painful or uncomfortable. Zephaniah 3:17 says:
"The LORD your God is in your midst,
a mighty one who will save;
he will rejoice over you with gladness;
he will quiet you by his love;
he will exult over you with loud singing."

The story of Elijah from 1 Kings is something we touched on during IV: (1 Kings 19:11-13)

The LORD said, "Go out and stand on the mountain in the presence of the LORD, for the LORD is about to pass by." Then a great and powerful wind tore the mountains apart and shattered the rocks before the LORD, but the LORD was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the LORD was not in the earthquake. After the earthquake came a fire, but the LORD was not in the fire. And after the fire came a gentle whisper. When Elijah heard it, he pulled his cloak over his face and went out and stood at the mouth of the cave.

This question was posed: "Is it possible that you've been searching for God in the winds, the earthquakes and fires and He's waiting to speak to you in the silence?

Jesus says in Matthew 11: "Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden in light." (Matthew 11:28-30)

I am guilty of always needing to be around people or of always needing to have noise. I walk around campus with my iPod in my ears. David actually called me out on it, telling me it makes me seem inaccessible/unapproachable. He said it's like having a big sign on my forehead that says, "Leave me alone." And he's right. I am not trying to be inaccessible, it's just my method for destressing. But yeah, so I'm going to work on that.

Last night we were playing Dutch Blitz (per usual), and my friend Anne from highschool had come to stay the night. It was fun and I like that my college friends (KVP, Amanda, Kelsey, Eric and David) like her. That makes me happy. But the things that get said when we're playing cards are certainly worth mentioning on the blog. I always tell them "that's going on the blog" (the blog they don't read...) but I usually forget the quotes before I have a chance to post. But I wrote a couple down last night.

"I feel a lot more mellow with Jack Johnson singing from my lap." (David)

Kelsey was heading for the bathroom when she turned around and looked at us. We were like: "What?" And she said, "I was going to wash my hands and I was going to ask if anybody wanted me to wash theirs, but..."

My friends are absolutely the best. And as David says God pretty much rocks my face off.