Sunday, September 28, 2003

Alright, hey everybody. I don't know how many of you ppl still read this, but for anyone who does, I want to share about my weekend with you.
It was a truly life-altering weekend. We learned about living life.
The prompt of the weekend, and the inspiration for three sessions, was "A LIFE TRULY LIVED IS A LIFE. . ."

-A life with meaning/purpose
-A life given
-A life received

I am not, however, going to sit here and preach to you. I do want to tell you, though, that YOUR life is special to God, and YOU were worth Jesus's sacfice on the cross.

One of the things I have struggled a lot with in the past two years is the question one of my pastor's posed during a sermon. "Is the life you're living worth Christ dying for?" I went to bed many a night, crying because I didn't feel like a) my life was worth ANYONE dying for, especially the Son of God, and b) that I was unworthy of this incredible sacrifice. [Note: This DOES NOT mean that I think I should be PERFECT in any way, because only Jesus was, and ever will be.] I wanted to live a life that was worth what Jesus endured on the cross, but I didn't believe that I was worth it or that I was even slightly capable of living one that was worth that.

Well, this retreat changed my entire outlook. I am worthy of the sacrifice, which is part of the receiving thing. I have to be able to receive with an open heart, and to graciously accept what He did for/gave me. It's hard to fathom that I, a child, who does so much wrong, and isn't perfect is worth the crucifixtion of the Son of God, but it's true.

I also learned that everyone has a purpose in life, be it music, charitable work, etc, but all are equally important. We all need to use what gifts and abilities God gave us to live a meaningful life. However, we also discussed, that, (take me for example), my purpose right now might be to glorify God through dance, while 20 years down the road, it may be in another area (ie medicine, teaching, etc), and we have to be open to the changes God has for us in our purpose.

A life truly lived is a life given. When Jesus died, He gave us a promise that if we accepted and believe in Him, that we would have eternal life (John 3:16, "For God so loved the world that He gave His only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall NOT perish but have everlasting life."), and He gave us mercy and forgiveness, and unconditional love, and hope.

Alright, now about the rest of the retreat:
Friday: Got on the bus around 6, left and drove up to Camp Hanes (affiliate of the YMCA).
Once there, we unpacked, and then went to a short meeting, about general rules (ie: NO PURPLE!!! ---this is kinda an inside joke at retreats: Girls' cabins have pink steps, and the guys' cabins have blue steps. If a girl steps on a guys' porch, the porch becomes PURPLE, and vice versa for the guys. THERE IS NO PURPLE!!!! *wink*)
Then we played trainwreck (not cool if you have a torn ligament), and mafia (*yawn*) Then it was time for beddy-by. Lights were supposed to be out at 11, but being that we are girls and LOVE To talk and giggle until all hours, it was, well, let's just say LATE!!!! by the time we turned out the lights! My youth leader Leslie and I got up at 6 to go run (yeah, it was kinda stupid, because on a mountain, you don't run up and down consistently. You run up until you feel like your legs are gonna fall off, then you run down and keep sliding on the rocks!!!!) and we got back to the cabin about seven, which is when we woke everyone else up, and then it was a mad dash! 20 girls and 8 leaders, all scrambling to use one of the three showers BEFORE the hot water ran out!!!!! Not cool. Then my youth leader Lexi (not to be confused with Leslie) fixed my hair before breakfast, cause with a torn ligament in my elbow, fixing hair is just the slightest bit, well, DIFFICULT! Then breakfast, then individual devotionals, then our first true group session. Then lunch, then 4 hours of free time. It would have been nice if I could have canoed, (but again the arm prevents that), or climbed the rock wall (stupid arm), or swam (why did i have to tear the ligament anyway?), but I went about half way up the mountain, and then down again. Lol. (Cam, that was SUPER FUN!) Then Lexi re-did my hair cause it was falling out. Then dinner. Then group-session number two. Then a half our of time in the gym, to play crab tag or somethin. Then Aladdin. (Lexi and Allison, both youth leaders, decided it would be funny to sing ALL the songs with the movie. SHEESH. College kids have NO LIFE!) Then bed time, and again we didn't turn the lights out in time. oh Well. Lights went on at 7 am, and no we didn't run on Sunday cause it was freakin cold and rainy, and we were a little sore from a hike up and a run up the mountain!!!! haha Another mad dash for the showers, then breakfast. Then pictures, then group session number 3. Then packing up and getting ready to go home. Then lunch, and then on the buses to go home.

Funny quotes, though you probably had to be there:
"Huh? What? I can't hear because Cameron kicked my ear, and now I can't hear." -Eric
"Do you mind if I throw ice cold water all over you?"-Some kid who thinks I would ENJOY that!!! (w/e)
"Cameron, where'd you put my salad?" -Me cause Cam kept stealing my salad while I was eating my sandwich!!!
"Don't put bumps in my hair, Lexi. I don't like bumps. . . Are you SURE they're even? Because they need to be even, and the ribbons have to be the same size too." -Me while Lexi was fixing my hair, because she was putting these little pig-tail bun things on the side of my head, and I wanted them to be neat and even with NO BUMPS!) Her response:
"Beggars can't be choosers!" -Lex
Hahahaha. Needless to say, it was an awesome trip. THere are more fun stories to come, but I really should do something productive right now, (NOT that any of you made it all the way through this!!!!!) lol

School, and doctor and dance tomorrow.
And court on Tuesday (not that I have a choice in the matter of going, but I really really really really really really really really would rather talk to a judge in chambers instead of standing up infront of my dad, mom, and all these other people and telling them about EVERYTHING that has happened in my life over the last four years. Geeze. Anyway, I won't complain. No one likes whiners, and I don't want to be one. (the weird thing is that they are NOT fighting over me, cause my dad has basically said "Yeah, I don't think it is working out for us to see each other. . ."-sounds like a boyfriend doesn't it? and to think. .. .. . anyway, they are only fighting over my sister, but they don't want to tear her apart by having her testify, and really, if I can keep her from having to, I will. I don't want her to have to, cause it is really hard and it truly does tear you apart.) anway, enough ranting.

Later everyone. If you have ANY questions about anything I posted, then let me know and I will answer them!!!! (I don't want to be preach-y but I know that not all of that made sense and I am trying to type rapidly and finish, but if you need more info about stuff, let me know and I will gladly accomodate you.)

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